The Wedding

"Two are better than one, for they have a good reward for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion."  - Ecclesiastes 4:9

The much talked about "wedding on the farm" finally took place on June 1st, and it was beautiful.
It was a unique wedding, not only because of the amazing handmade touches to everything, the creative displays, photo booth, the meal that came straight from the farm, and fun reception games. It was also unique because of the way that this couple decided to conduct their relationship before the wedding day.  They followed a betrothal process, which made the ceremony meaningful in it's own way.

Here is the jist of their story. :)

A Love Story

Emily & Sammy met at Messiah West Coast (a youth summer camp) in 2011, and built a friendship afterward guided by their parents.  Sammy knew right when he saw Emily that she was the one he was going to marry.  Emily liked Sammy but had things to do...one of them being going to Israel.  After camp, Emily took a trip to Israel and worked with a ministry called HaYovel.  She was really inspired there by the standards of purity in the group, and decided that when she got married that she would do things in a biblical fashion. While Emily was in Israel, Sammy pursued gaining Emily's father's approval by moving to the property here in Orosi to be a part of GIT (Growing in Torah).  He worked on the farm for 6 months. When Emily returned from her 6 week Israel trip, she and Sammy continued their friendship.  They decided not to "date". Sammy had been in relationships before, and had decided that he was going to "do things differently this time." Sammy returned the following year for the program and the two of them got to know each other better in a group setting.

The Betrothal
"I will betroth you to Me forever; Yes, I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and in justice, In lovingkindness and in compassion." - Hosea 2:19

A betrothal is a serious commitment between two people.  It is different than dating, courting, or even an engagement. There is no "trying someone out" to see if they fit, or spending lots of time together alone. This is how a typical betrothal works:  1) The guy and girl get to know each other as friends in a group setting, and any time spent together as friends is chaperoned. 2) After a time when the guy believes that she is "the one", he then makes his move and asks permission from the girl's father to marry his daughter. 3) Provided that the girl wants the same thing, the couple is betrothed; and, ideally, the couple remains separated until their wedding. "Betrothal is made to protect the hearts of the two individuals." ~Emily

After two years of "only friendship" with Emily,  Sammy asked her father for her hand in marriage.  Her dad gave his blessing, and within a short time they read vows to each other, she took his last name, and he started preparing a place for them to live.  Because they both lived on the same property, their betrothal wasn't typical. (ie they saw each other every day, which Emily said made the process much more difficult.)  An example of betrothal in the Bible: Mary & Joseph. A betrothal is like being married, but without living together.

Bryan (Emily's dad) shared at the reception how agonizing the betrothal was for Emily. "I have his ring, I have his last name, but I don't have him!" He compared how similar it is with our heavenly bridegroom, Yeshua (Jesus). We are betrothed to Him (Hosea 2:9), we have taken his name (Revelation 14:1), and "He goes to prepare a place for us" (John 14:2) but we won't see His face or have His full presence until He returns.

Bryan posed the question: Do we yearn for His return like a lovesick bride?

                                    ~ The Wedding Day ~

Mother (Karla) & daughter

The kiddos, right before the ceremony

Father (Bryan) & daughter walking down the aisle

The Bridesmaids (Emily's two sisters on the right)

Groomsmen. Sammy's dad on the left.

Leah, Emily's sister, made this amazing cake herself.

Mr. & Mrs. Carter

On a personal note, when I have gone to weddings in the past, my mind often slips into "regretful-mode", thinking about the many mishaps that occurred at my own wedding, the stress, and things that I should have done differently.  In other words, I suffer from Post Traumatic Wedding Disorder. ;) This has made me a bit wedding-phobic.  However, this time around, this is what I learned....

-It's much funner to help with someone else's wedding than plan your own.
-The best way to cure your own wedding woes is to help someone else's go spectacularly well.
-how to fold fancy napkins :)
-I have learned a lot about being married in 14 years and still have a lot to learn.
-A wedding lasts a day, but a marriage lasts a lifetime......and I am SO thankful that even though my wedding was a "dud" in certain ways, my marriage is getting better and better as the years go by. :)

Thoughts on Marriage from a book I'm reading....

quotes from Women's Wisdom: The Garden of Peace for Women

"A true home is built through love and generosity - through thinking of the other person."

"Compassion begins at home."

"The most important things in life depend on gratitude. This is particularly true with regard to marital bliss. If both husband and wife seek out the good points in one another and thank each other for their kindnesses, they will surely develop a wonderful, genuine love."

"A good spouse will not concern himself with what his wife/husband is or is not doing. Rather, a good spouse will devote his efforts and thoughts on what he/she can do to build their home, improve their marital partnership, and enhance the love between man and wife."